I make casual friends really easily. In law school, I was four years out of college. Most of the other students had not gone to graduate school, had another career, or gotten married. A handful already had kids, but those students were too busy with their children to really socialize. I had little in common with the other students. In addition, my life wasn't going so well. Alan was struggling with a bad time at his job, eventually losing his job halfway through my first year of law school. He was unhappy and difficult to live with. (Looking back at that time, it showed us we could get through anything, together. But it was impossible to see it as a blessing back then.) So I made casual friends, but no one of substance.
Then, one day, I found myself sitting next to Betsy.
I noticed Betsy, because she was always late to class. Or skipping class. And she was one of the few people who brought a laptop to class (though everyone does these days, I'm sure) so she was always late AND looking for a good seat, in the back, with a plug for her computer. It drove me crazy that someone would show up habitually late and unorganized. So I watched her, because I'm stupid and obsessive like that.
She was in tons of my classes. Her taste in electives mirrored mine - juvenile law, family law, advanced con law, and criminal punishment class. Few law students took these classes, since they are of little use in personal injury or big law firm work. So to have one other person show up at everything I enjoyed was interesting. We started to compete for top grades in these classes. I would make the top grade in the juvenile class and she would respond with the top grade in punishment class. We started to borrow notes from one another. I started to realize that she was smart, not afraid to ask questions, and had a wonderful heart.
Her perpencity to run late still drove me crazy (and probably still would, if I saw her all the time), but it was far outweighed by all her gifts. And, if anything, she was more willing to share her gifts than anyone else I knew. If she showed up a little late, well, she was worth waiting for, because she would say something insightful, or calm my nerves, or ask the right question.
I had known her a long time before I discovered she was a giftie, having graduated from LSMSA a few years after I did. I should have known.
We studied for the bar exam together, ate sushi in copious amounts, and developed our ideals as wives and mothers, together.
I had made a friend. Not an easy, casual friend, but a real friend, who I could cherish and respect.
Happy birthday, Betsy! I'm blessed to know you.
Etcetera.
3 comments:
that was very sweet.
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